Hallm*rk Block

I have the worst time shopping for cards.  I walk into Hallm*rk, and I become totally incapable of decision making.  Not only that, but my three-year-old is in love with those cards that talk or play songs.  So, she walks into Hallmark and begins taking every. single. one. off the shelves.  Meaning that I spend most of my shopping time trying to keep her from crunching a card that costs $5.99.


I was in Hallm*rk yesterday some time ago, shopping for a birthday card for Jeremy.  I think I read about 92 cards, and there wasn't a single one that said exactly what I wanted.  First of all, I wanted something with no rhyming.  A card for my 31-year-old husband shouldn't sound remotely like anything written by Dr. Seuss.  "On your special day, you take my breath away."  I mean, really?  


(Okay, so I didn't actually read that on a card, but you thought I did for minute.  Didn't you?)  


Second, I know this is going to shock you, but our life is not perfect.  We don't spend all of our days gazing into each other's eyes in blissful happiness.  (I'm hoping this is normal, but after seven-and-a-half years I'm still figuring out this whole marriage thing.)  I read way too many cards that said something like, "So glad we're living happily ever after together".  That's not us.  Our life is a whole lot less Disneyish than that.  We've been through some tough stuff together. 


I did finally pick a card.  It's cute.  It's sweet.  It's not exactly right.


So, in honor of the day that makes my husband officially as old as I am, I decided to write my own card.  Here goes.


This road we've walked together hasn't been easy.  Our journey has taken us through valleys where the darkness was so thick it caught in our throats and we thought we'd never feel the smile of sunshine on our faces again.  We've climbed rugged mountains that have stolen our breath and made our muscles scream with each agonizing step.  We've wandered through deserts of anticipation - waiting...waiting...waiting.


I can't see what the road ahead holds.  Joy?  Disappointment?  Confusion?  It doesn't matter.  Because in each place our journey has led, we've been together.  We've looked to our heavenly Father and done our best to follow his leading together.  Your hand has been in mine, and I have never doubted your love for me.  You have been my rock: strong, steady, and true.  


Thank you for walking beside me, for carrying me when I couldn't take another step, and for holding the lantern when I felt lost in the darkness.  I can't imagine taking this journey without you.  

Happy birthday, babe.  I love you forever.

P.S.  I think you're pretty hot.

Wednesday's Waiting Child: Darren

UPDATE (1-26-12): Darren now has a family working to bring him home.


I am so incredibly excited about today's waiting child that I am actually starting this post on Tuesday because Wednesday just couldn't come fast enough. This little boy is beyond precious. He has been on my heart for quite a while. His picture on Reeces Rainbow was just updated, and my heart absolutely melted when I saw this...

What a little ray of sunshine! This is “Darren” (not his real name). He's two years old, and he has Down Syndrome. He lives in an orphanage in the country-that-cannot-be-named. His parent(s) decided not to take him home from the hospital when he was born, so the orphanage has been his home for his entire life.

I wish I knew more about Darren. I do know that he's happy and full of life and has bright blue eyes. To the best of my knowledge, he does not have any of the heart issues that sometimes accompany Down Syndrome.

OH. MY. GOODNESS. Does he look like he would be a blessing to a family, or what? Check out his cute folded hands.

I was able to dig up some older pictures of Darren. These were taken in May of 2010, around Darren's first birthday. Nothing quite like a blond-haired, blue-eyed boy in a sailor suit!

I am incredibly optimistic that someone will go get this sweetie, but he's been waiting for more than two years and it hasn't happened yet. The reality is that Darren's future doesn't look good if he stays where he is now. In as little as twenty months, this sweet boy could be transferred to a mental institution. And that thought hurts my heart.

Darren's orphanage is in an “easy” region. The adoption process in this region is usually very quick (and, therefore, less expensive). I actually have a friend who is traveling to Darren's orphanage to adopt her little boy later this month, so I'd be happy to give you her contact information if you'd like to know more about this region and/or the adoption process in this country.

Do you have room in your heart for this beautiful little one? Do you know someone who might? Please pass his picture along. And, most of all, please pray for this precious boy to find his family soon. Thanks, guys!

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On another note, we signed Em up for swim lessons this fall.  She has been loving the water this summer, and I'd like her to keeping swimming during the cold months so she doesn't have to start all over next summer.  She had her first lesson this morning.  I took my camera, with visions in my head of the cute, splashy pictures I would share with you guys today.  Um, not so much...

After completely freaking out the first two times the instructor tried to swim with her, Emma began politely saying, "No, thank you" every time she was asked to get in the pool.  So, she pretty much spent the lesson sitting on the edge of the pool watching the other kids swim.  Oh well, we'll keep trying.

The Best Thing about Fall

The sky is cloudy.  The mornings are chilly.  The leaves are turning.  I have to admit it: summer is saying goodbye.


I love summer.  Love everything about it.  I'll never tire of long hot days at the lake, camping out with my two favorite people, or watching the fireflies dance across the front lawn.  (I so missed out on fireflies growing up in California!)


September is a little bittersweet in my mind.  Don't get me wrong, I'm a big fan of hot cider, campfires on chilly evenings, and pumpkin carving parties.  It's just...well...the further we get from the blazing days of summer, the closer we get to that horrible cold season that I could completely live without.  January is not my friend.


There's one thing about fall and the beginning of w***** that helps me overcome my end-of-the-summer doldrums.  Something I love even more than apple cider.  Something I look forward to every. single. weekend.  I know, I'm a total tomboy, but it's the NFL that keeps me going.


I love watching football.  Seriously.  I don't just watch it because it's something fun and cuddly to do with my husband (although it is!), I really watch it.  I understand things like horse collars, two point conversions, and laterals.  This isn't something that's grown on me since I married a former football stud.  I LOVED the 49ers growing up.  My best friend's dad had season tickets about 20 rows up on the 35 yard line.  (Yes, I've practically touched Steve Young and Jerry Rice.) 


So...in light of what I think is the best thing about fall...happy first NFL Sunday!  And, although I know this is sort of a lost cause at this point, GO COLTS!!!  (Scroll down for a quick adoption update.)

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As many of you know, we're waiting on a certain Eastern European country to expand their special needs list so we can go get our little ones.  (The current list does not include HIV, so children under five who are HIV+ are not eligible for international adoption.)  The new list is supposed to be released no later than October 11.  That's a month from tomorrow.


I received some pictures from a friend who adopted an adorable little girl from our country in May.  It is very possible that we will adopt from the same orphanage she did as all the children in this orphanage are HIV+.  My friend emailed me a bunch of pictures of the children who are still living in the orphanage.  Looking at the pictures hurt my heart.  Seeing the smiles, the precious faces, the real children who are living each day without mamas and papas.  It's hard to know that these little ones are waiting and so are we.  Waiting to go meet them.  Waiting to hug and cuddle them.  Waiting to be their mama and papa forever and ever. Ouch!


So many little ones will be left waiting if the list is not expanded.  Please pray for this situation as October 11 gets closer.  Pray that those involved in the decision making process would put politics aside and consider the needs of these precious children.  Pray that the door would swing wide open for families to go get waiting children with HIV, FAS, hydrocephaly, kidney problems, heart problems, and many more special needs.  (I personally know of families who are waiting right now to bring home a little one/s with each of the special needs listed above.)


We are hearing encouraging rumors (like that there is a draft list nearing completion and that HIV is expected to be on it), but these are only rumors at this point.  We do know that the list could be released at any time - even as soon as this week!!!  How amazing would that be?!?


Thanks for your prayers and encouragement.  I was blown away by all the sweet comments I got after posting on Tuesday.  You guys are the best!

An Unexpected Blessing

Fall arrived here overnight.  95 on Saturday and 65 on Tuesday = Fall in the Midwest.  So, I'm curled up on the couch with my yummy Trader Joe's chai - thanks, Mom! - to blog about another crazy twist in our adoption adventure.  I wish you all could be here so I could share this fun news in person.  (I'd share my chai, too! ;)


If you've been following along with our adoption journey, you know things haven't been easy and the road certainly hasn't been smooth.   (If you want to catch up, you can read about how this adventure began here and how a law change has us waiting and praying for our future little ones in Eastern Europe here.)  The last three months I have struggled to wait patiently on God's timing and his direction for our family.  I have longed to have our future children home, to watch them play in the yard with Emma, to hold them and kiss away their tears.  It has been a hard three months for this mama's heart.


Two weeks ago, I got a text that took me by surprise.  The text was sent by a friend who is hoping to adopt a baby domestically.  She and her husband had been contacted about a birthmother in Texas.  They didn't feel that this baby was a fit for their family, so they passed along our contact information.  During the past two weeks we've sent an introductory letter and pictures to this birthmother, prayed for this unborn little one, and contacted an attorney.  And...


...we're expecting a baby on March 16!!!


Wow!  This is not the direction we thought our journey was going but what a surprise blessing!  I have to confess that I've debated about whether or not to share this news publicly.  Before Emma was born, we experienced a failed adoption.  It was hard.  Beyond hard.  Part of me wanted to keep this news a secret to protect my heart from hurting that way again.  But then I reconsidered.  You - my amazing friends, family, and blog-land acquaintances - have been there for me along this journey in an amazing way.  You've shared words of encouragement and support. You've rejoiced when we rejoiced and cried when we cried.  I am confident that all of you will be there for us on our next adventure - no matter how things work out.


Some of you might be wondering how this adoption affects our process in Eastern Europe.  That was one of our first considerations when we were approached with this new possibility.  Our hearts are in EE.  We feel that God has called us to EE and to HIV adoption.  I think of the sweet faces of waiting children every. single. day.  


We have communicated with our birthmom and our social worker about our desire to continue with our adoption in EE if the door opens.  (C'mon new list!)  Both expressed 100% approval.  If the special needs list is expanded next month, we'll be headed to EE.


So, yes, we could possibly welcome home our fourth child in March.  (Who wants to sign up to babysit?)  


Crazy?  Absolutely!  


Unexpected?  Totally.  


A HUGE BLESSING? Definitely.

Say Cheese!

I really meant to take a break from blogging over the holiday weekend, but I just got Emma's three-year pictures back and couldn't resist sharing a few of my favorites.  My friend, Marissa, took her pictures on Wednesday evening.  She did such an amazing job!  It was fun to be outside instead of in a studio, and I really feel like the photos capture Em's good mood after being bribed with Goldfish multiple times Em's personality.  Enjoy!

This one is special because Emma is reading a copy of Cinderella that I received as a gift from my uncle when I was six.  It's one of her favorite books right now.  She loves hearing it and reading it herself!

I love, love, love all of these, but I think this one is my absolute favorite.

The photographer gave Em this old camera to "take pictures", and Emma did not want to put it down.  If you look carefully at the tent picture above, you can see she's still holding the camera.

So thankful to be able to capture memories of my goofy, precocious, beautiful three year old.  Marissa, you totally rock!  

School Days

Thursday night Jeremy and I went on a double date with some friends.  We took in a baseball game at a nearby minor league ballpark.  It was a fun night, but the game started at 7:05pm and went until the bottom of the 11th inning - yawn!  Needless to say, our second day of preschool didn't get off to a super timely start.  (I guess starting our day at 10:30 is one of the pros of preschool at home. ;)


Here's Emma making letters in rice on a cookie sheet.  (Thanks, Connie, for your great idea!)  I tried to convince Em that it was like writing in the sand by a pond, but she was pretty sure it was just rice. 

Emma made "Ants on a Log" for snack.  Yes, all you organic mamas out there, I am trying to make up for my horribly unhealthy trail mix snack on Tuesday. :)

September is off to a blazing start, so we're soaking up the last hot days of summer.  Today we played an outside game called "Hop Across the Pond".  I used blue sidewalk chalk to draw two wavy lines to represent the two sides of our pond.  I filled the middle of the "pond" with stepping stones; each stone had a number on it (1-5).  Emma had to hop across the pond, calling out each number as she hopped on it.  She really had fun and was excited to teach Daddy how to play when he came home from work.

(Mom and Dad, can you tell that Em's wearing her Real Dirt shirt from Kauai?  She loves it!)

We finished the day with a craft.  Emma and I made a backpack out of a garbage bag, duct tape, and fabric strips.  Emma got to sit outside and paint her backpack.  This was definitely the highlight of the day for her.  She loved, loved, loved painting.  I'm going to have to think of more things we can do with paint.

Here's Emma modeling her new backpack.  She insisted on bringing it with her while we ran errands and even wore it into the bank.  (Our bank has been amazingly supportive of our adoption journeys.  One women there notarizes everything we have ever needed - which has amounted to quite the gigantic stack of paperwork - for free.  She helped us with Em's adoption as well, and she's always excited to see Em.)

Speaking of adoption, I have some really exciting news to share.  Check back on Tuesday, and I'll fill you in! :)  Enjoy the long weekend!

Emma's First Day

We survived!  Our first day of preschool at home went really well, and Emma and I both enjoyed ourselves.  Here's a little peek at Emma's very first day of school.  (If you want the short version, just scroll down through the pictures.  They pretty much tell the story.)

I had to take the classic first day of school picture on the front steps.  (Okay, so my child wasn't actually going anywhere - or even wearing shoes for that matter - but I think it's still a special memory.)

We started off with singing.  (Emma kept insisting that singing is not part of school.  Thanks, expert preschooler.)  After that we read a camping story together (Henry and Mudge and the Starry Night).  

There's a place in the story where Henry's mom builds a campfire, so Em and I used sticks collected from the yard to make our own campfire.  Emma even pulled out her play food and cooked some plastic sausage in one of our campfire cookers.  Emma was more excited about cooking than making letters with the sticks, but she did a little bit of that too.  Here she is making an "I".

I wanted to set aside a few minutes for Emma to read/look at books on her own.  She's not the best at staying focused when she's reading on her own (as in, not good at reading for more than 3.7 seconds).  I thought we could start with five minutes of quiet reading and go from there.  

We went in the tent and each read our own books.  The timer rang after five minutes, and Emma didn't want to stop reading.  She looked at books (especially the Henry and Mudge book) for more than twenty minutes.  I was totally surprised and thrilled.  If a love of reading is the only thing Emma takes away from our school time together, I will be completely satisfied.

When Em was done with her books, we read a poem about fireflies together.  Emma used a pointer to find the title and several letters in the poem.  (She loves her "hand thing" as she calls it.)  We also turned the lights off, closed the windows, and clicked flashlights on and off as we read about fireflies clicking their lights on and off again.

For math practice, Emma counted out frogs onto pond mats.  Numbers have been more difficult for her to master than letters.  We're focusing on 1-5 this month; she's got 1, 2, and 3, but she's not quite there with 4 and 5.  (If you have some fun ideas for practicing numbers, please send them my way!)

By the time we finished math, Emma was ready for a snack break.  She counted out the ingredients to make friendship trail mix.  Here she is with chocolate on her face and all the super healthy yummy ingredients in the background.

We finished up with "The Hungry Bear Game".  I think this was Emma favorite part of the day.  We set out a checkered tablecloth with several camping-related items on it (mug, cooler, flashlight, etc.).  Emma closed her eyes and pretended to sleep in the tent.  While she was sleeping, a hungry bear (a.k.a. Mommy) dragged off one of the items.  When Emma woke up, it was her job to figure out which item had been stolen.  Then it was Em's turn to be the bear.  I think she would have played this game all day long.

For the science portion of our camping unit, we're talking about ponds.  Today we took a mini field trip to a nearby pond.  Emma used her binoculars to look for wildlife.  We actually saw turtles, a frog, and a killdeer.  Check out my little biologist.

After visiting the pond, we headed to a friend's house.  My friend asked Emma what she'd learned during school.  Emma's response was, "We played a game, and a bear stole stuff."  

Okay, so clearly my OCD lesson plans haven't turned my child into a genius overnight.  But it was fun.  And I got to spend lots of time with my sweet girl.  Total success in my book.